Being brave is not always some extravagant display like jumping from a plane or going up against a large grizzly bear. It can be little feats within us. It is being strong in difficult situations. Facing our fears and taking control of them. Anytime you feel uncomfortable or fear something, do it anyway; be brave.
I am brave when I advocate for myself.
I am brave when I do uncomfortable things.
I am brave when I go against societal norms.
I am brave when I face any fear I have – no matter how severe.
I am brave when I face my negative thoughts and emotions daily.
I am brave when posting my writings for others to read, despite fearing judgment.
You are brave every day without even realizing it.
Bravery is something we define ourselves.
Being brave is facing any fear we may have. It is doing things that make us feel uncomfortable or scared.
Recently, anxiety began controlling my life. I made the decision to take a mental health break from work.
I put off telling anyone, fearing they wouldn’t be supportive. It was an internal fear of judgment that fed this fear. This fear was proven true when someone responded: “It must be nice! I had 2 mouths to feed – there was no time for a break”.
I was brave and advocated for myself anyway. I didn’t let my negative thoughts control me; I faced them head-on.
Regulating my own emotions is another major fear and struggle of mine – leading to a lot of co-dependency.
With my co-dependent tendencies, I struggle with low self-esteem and a lack of trust in myself. I fear that I might become triggered and not know how to handle my emotions without my fiancé, Dani. This is not a healthy way to live in a relationship for either of us.
I ask her for a lot of direction – even with things as simple as what I should be doing at that moment. I need constant reassurance and find myself looking to her for help with calming my “complex” emotions.
It wasn’t until recently that I decided fear will not hold me back anymore.
You see, I feel the need for my fiancé to go everywhere with me to “protect me from myself,” regardless of the support system present.
Braving this fear of being without her boosted my confidence tremendously. I realized I am capable of doing hard things “alone.” I was strong enough to deal with my emotions because they were based on fear. I can live with the uncomfortableness and show my fear I am not afraid.
The more I have braved these negative beliefs, the less uncomfortable they’ve become.
Since choosing to fight my demons head-on, I have become more independent. I go places independently now without fearing my emotions. There will no longer be situations where I can’t handle my emotions without Dani because I am stronger than them!
This is a prime example of how bravery is defined within us. The fears we have are unique to who we are.
I view bravery as facing the uncomfortable. Doing anything that causes the slightest bit of anxiety IS BRAVE.
No fear is too small!
Fear is so much more complicated than most people understand.
To discuss bravery properly, we need to understand the core of what we fear. We all have what some may call small fears. However, to me, no fear is less scary than another. FEAR IS FEAR.
Take the story above, for example. It may sound silly to some of you to feel being brave is simply doing something “alone.” You were with family – why would you be anxious about that?
The truth is, I’m petrified by the idea that something will happen, and I will need reassurance or saving from my own anxiety. I worry I’ll come home, Dani will be gone, or I won’t be “strong enough” alone.
I feel that what we fear frequently is not something we can control, but we can choose to be brave and face them.
Check out the 20 FREE downloadable journal entries at the bottom of the post to understand your fears and find your braveness!
Are your fears created by you, or were they learned/taught?
Are the things you’re afraid of because of a past situation, or were they something you were taught to fear?
Fear is something our subconscious perceives as dangerous to our well-being. These can be learned, innate, or developed. It is typically something that has traumatized us in the past or how we have been conditioned to respond to the situation.
The deeper we dive into the “why” behind our fears, the more we can learn to make them strengths instead. Being brave is something we can do EVERY DAY.
Remember: facing any situation that causes uncomfortableness or fear is brave.
How can you be brave everyday?
1. Advocate for yourself and your needs.
Sometimes being brave is as simple as standing up for yourself and your needs, regardless of how others may respond. Do things you need to do to fulfill yourself and not feel guilty. Standing up for your beliefs even if they contradict everything you’ve been taught. Advocate for yourself. (I discuss self-advocacy in detail in a previous post: “Advocate for yourself: It saved my life” if you want to challenge yourself to self-advocacy!)
2. Acknowledge your fear and confront it.
Don’t just sweep it under the rug and ignore it. It’s not going to go away. The more we face our fears, the more we grow
3. Use positive self-talk.
Self-talk is that little voice in our head that declares our thoughts and beliefs.
When you find yourself afraid, you probably spiral into negative self-talk with phrases like:
“I want to advocate for my needs, but I’m afraid of how others will react.”
“I want to ask for a raise, but they may think I’m not worth it.”
“I’m not going to that social event. What if I don’t know anyone there?”
Change these negative voices in your head that drives fear. When you start believing negative thoughts, you stunt your own growth.
Catch these thoughts when they arise and turn them into positive ones:
“I know what is best for me, and I am worthy of receiving that.”
“I work hard at what I do. I deserve to be paid accordingly.”
“I can talk to new people, even if it makes me uncomfortable.”
Consistently using this positive self-talk will instill confidence in you that you didn’t know you had. It will give you the ability to overcome your fears and be brave.
4. Get comfortable being uncomfortable.
Learning to live in uncomfortableness will help you face any fear. The best way to become fearless is to put yourself in uncomfortable situations that intimidate you. It won’t be fun nor easy but have faith- this can be life-changing. Each time you accept the uncomfortableness, the easier it gets.
5. Make being brave a habit.
Once you have conquered your fear the first time, keep going. Strengthen your braveness by overcoming your fears regularly.
Make a list of things you would do if you weren’t afraid. Take this list and start doing one of those things. Start with the easiest and then move your way up the difficulty ladder.
6. Embrace failure.
We often don’t do things out of fear of failure. This is an essential part of becoming brave. Don’t try something once, fail, then give up.
7. Don’t aim for perfection.
When facing a fear, approach it from a beginner’s mindset. Start slow and small. No need to set unrealistic expectations for yourself!
Approach it with curiosity and see where it leads. When you learn to not judge an outcome as good or bad, you lose the fear of failing. Instead of aiming for perfection, strive for bravery.
Be sure to check out the 20 FREE downloadable journal entries at the bottom of the post to understand your fears and find your braveness.
Now go be brave and inspire others to do the same!
Learning to be brave doesn’t mean you can’t be afraid at first. It means doing something despite how much you fear it.
Being brave is seeing an opportunity instead of a barricade. The opportunity to grow personally, emotionally, and even professionally. Looking at your fears in depth can lead you to the areas of your life that need the most work.
Using positive self-talk or putting yourself in uncomfortable situations may seem small, but this is vital in building self-confidence and becoming brave.
When something feels scary, ask yourself why. Don’t let that negative voice make you think your fears are irrational. Instead, find the root of the issue so you can face it.
See my FREE downloadable journal prompts at the bottom of the post to start learning where your fears stem from and how to face them with grace!
Next time you fear a situation, think about how strong you have become.
This uncomfortable feeling won’t last forever – you are stronger than those feelings. The negative thoughts you may have that try and stop you are a trap.
Be brave — stand up to your negative thoughts and tell yourself that you are stronger than they are!
Be brave — tell people your needs or feelings even if it makes you uncomfortable!
Be brave — dig into your own fears and discover what drives them!
How will you use these steps to challenge yourself to be brave?
Finally, recondition the way you see bravery and take every small victory and celebrate it.
Society and others may see your feats as small, but everyone’s journey and perspective on life are different. Give yourself credit for the scary or difficult things you are doing!
Honor each brave act as a celebratory victory like you would for someone else! You deserve it!!
I challenge you to put on your superhero cape and face those fears, big or small. Be brave every day and celebrate each victory as a large feat.
Don’t forget to check out the 20 FREE downloadable journal entries at the bottom of the post to find your braveness and understand your fears.
Boss up and be the fierce lion you are!
You are stronger than you think and braver than you know.
I’d love to hear from you! Leave a comment below sharing your fears, how you were brave, or just some feedback!
With love,
—CG <3
*P.S. Shout out to my sister, Hayley, for all the support she has provided me on this journey of growth! *
You made some great points. I appreciate you taking time to share these suggestions regarding facing your fears. If we don’t face them… we are allowing them to hinder us. Thank you for sharing .
Pastor Natalie (ExamineThisMoment)
Letstakeamoment.com